If It's Mellow Let It Yellow...

No, that's not right. But then again neither is the POOL of WATER that is currently soaking our carpet in the dining room and staining the drywall.

Happy 4th Anniversary! And your gift from the Universe is a massive water leak in your house!

That's right. We have a fucking mess on our hands as I type this.

Last Night, I noticed funny staining on the wall in the hallway. We opened up the wall and couldn't immediately find the problem. Neighbor came and looked at it but his advice was to let it dry and out then watch what happened when various things were used, to try to determine where the problem is. By late evening I thought I had pinpointed it to something under the sink/dishwasher. This morning, I showered, taught my two classes at the Y, came back and figured it was underneath the sink. Something under the sink because it's all wet under there. We tear a hole in the bottom of the sink cabinet in our search for the root cause.

Call the plumber recommendation from the neighbor and wouldn't you know it, the dude is on a day trip in Tijuana, but will be back later in the evening. I call a few others and they don't do house calls on weekends and refer me to the big name plumbers which I know will cost me my right arm. At this point, I am unaware of the true breadth of the problem. Water is turned off at this point, at the urging of the plumber in TJ. I call the TJ guy back to tell him that we'll wait for him to get back since I have no idea what I'm going to get with the other people I'm calling and he has been referred by people I trust. We go run a couple errands, get food, I come home, turn the water on momentarily to go to the bathroom and wash my face. Turn it off. Turn it on once more a little later so the husband can go to the bathroom.

Meanwhile, looks like the border patrol had their panties in an especially complicated knot this evening because 8:30pm rolls around and I get a call from the plumber. It took him 4 hours to get through the crossing. By this time, I have found that what appeared to be a mild-to-moderate leak, is actually a moderate-to-severe leak. The carpet in the dining room is soaked, there is water stain creeping up the drywall in there, as well as up the wall in the back of the coat closet.

Hello, second level of Hell. I would prefer to spend 10 hours or more at the DMV listening to the computerized female drone of alphanumeric combinations all of which are not, frustratingly, my number, than deal with this shit. I have to pee right now, and know that I will have to let it "mellow", because only two toilets remain with full tanks that will allow for a number 2 deposit (thank GOD we have 3 toilets in this house). And I have to go upstairs and use the guest bath because the downstairs one has since been flushed by the husband dropping the kids off at the pool. And we can't turn the water back on unless we want the entire first floor to begin to flood. Tearing up sopping wet carpet is hardly going to be a fun job and if I can avoid not flooding all of it, that would be ideal. It's enough that I have to rip it up, prematurely. Looks like that remodel is happening sooner than planned.

Lord. And the Husband has not showered since yesterday. It's looking highly likely that tomorrow morning he'll be showing down the street at the Y. How pathetic is this?

Seven AM tomorrow, the plumber comes. He thinks it's a slab leak which is bad fucking news. Bad. Read: Will cost lots of money. And who, in name of Jesus H. Christ, runs water lines through the damn slab?! How is this a good design? Doesn't that make repairing them just a little bit difficult? Gee, let's make future homeowners have to JACKHAMMER into the slab in the event they get a pipe that needs repair. I mean, water has pressure when it runs through the lines - there is no need to run through the slab - that's what the walls are for. For hiding electrical and plumbing.

Unbelievable. Boy do I miss our old, problem-free house.

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