Friday, January 9, 2009

So you know how I was saying...

...that I have to finish everything I buy regardless of it's suckiness? There is an exception to that rule and that would be Things That Give Me Bad Gas. Yes, we are talking about farts on this blog. You can navigate away now if you are above talking about flatulence. I am not. No surprise there.

Anyway, so I got this cereal, recently, from Fresh 'N Easy (a new British-based super-market chain which has excellent prices on dairy, canned items, pasta, etc) because it was high in fiber, good price, looked tasty, etc. Turns out it is tasty... also tasty for my lower intestines - so tasty, in fact,they are vociferously and odiferously expressing said tastiness. When I bought it, I only paid attention to the fiber content because, generally, fiber does not give me gas. I didn't pay attention to the protein content and the type of protein - it's soy protein. I have no issue eating tofu, tempeh, soy sausages, etc, but the soy protein they put in cereals and those soy crisps reek havoc on my intestines. I have eaten the cereal for 4 days and without fail, every afternoon into the evening, I have been stricken with The Gas.

I have the same issue with Kashi Go Lean Crunch which is a real bummer. Kashi Go Lean Crunch is seriously awesome. Great source of fiber, protein, and tastes good. I can literally snack on it like chips. I have been told that your body eventually gets used to the protein, but the question is when? I liked that cereal so much that I tried for several weeks just eating a small amount and ramping it up little by little to build a tolerance. No dice. One day it was so bad, that I had to leave work early because the bellyache was unbearable. I shared an office with this Indian guy and I was literally 4 feet away from him so there was no good way to let it out discreetly. And the bathrooms were those big one room deals where if you toot it will be known to everyone else sitting on the bowl. Six years later I still remember that day. That was when I had to chuck the rest into the trash. That's where the second half of the current offending box of cereal is going. I know, you're thinking, "can't your husband eat it so it doesn't go to waste?" Right. And then pigs will fly out of my ass along with the gas. He is very particular about his cereal - I have only seen him eat Frosted Mini Wheats in the 8 years I've known him, so, unfortunately, it will have to go to waste.

At least it's biodegradable.

4 comments:

  1. I love Go Lean, it actually tastes good! I make my aunt buy only healthy cereal and that is on our list along with Kashi with the hearts and circles. Oh and Special K extra protein...and its suddenly dawning on me why I'm so musical this week. Its all the clean living and extra work to digest the food!

    Make a bird feeder? With a pine cone, some peanut butter and push the cereal onto it...(I got that idea out of my kids magazine.)

    ReplyDelete
  2. You are obviously not going to make a bird feeder for you and the husband to enjoy. What am I thinking?

    I read up on grease stains and usually its hopelss if you washed & dried it already. BUT, I have had some success rubbing baby powder into the spot and washing.

    So even after talking about my phone issues it took me two hours to make the one call I really needed to make all week. And it was such a relief to only leave a msg and not have to talk to anyone.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Holding in Gas is the worst! The day I turn 65 is the last day I do that! It seems like the acceptable age to begin tooting in public. From what I have gathered. From my research on the subject. Or from my trips to Walmart.

    ReplyDelete
  4. It's because anything with fiber will give you gas to help your BM (bowel movement)

    prunes do it too

    You just have to be prudent and eat less of it..

    Fabulously Broke in the City
    Just a girl trying to find a balance between being a Shopaholic and a Saver...

    ReplyDelete