Thursday, June 26, 2008

That Which Probably Should Not Be Discussed

Life has hit a new low today, people. I have a staff meeting to attend for my side job as a yoga teacher in about 20 minutes and I am Desperately Seeking Relief in the form of Pressure Release. I just spent the last five minutes in various yoga postures, in the hopes that things would move from their current state of blocked and bloated. Down dog, forward fold, fetal position... Nothing. I mean, when I'm in a class teaching or practicing and I have this problem, it wants out faster than the speed of sound. It's sheer will to continue class without letting it out. But when I want it out and try the same moves? No dice.

I have only 20 minutes before I am subjected to 2 hours in a room with people where breaking loud wind is not an option. Well, I suppose it is an option if I don't care about total and complete embarrassment. Or if I were that French dude in the castle in Monty Python's Holy Grail ("I fart in your general direction"). Perhaps I should not have had that Indian food (so good, though) at lunch. Not proving to be a good decision.

An interesting license plate frame I saw today on my way home from work was "God Rules, Satan Drools". Really? He drools? I mean, sure, he sucks, he's evil, etc, etc, but "he drools"? I just cannot take that seriously. All I see in my head is a cartoon devil character a la Loony Toons with this pitchfork, drooling on his pillow at night. It does nothing to demonize "Satan" for me. As a non-practicing Catholic I am not impressed with this slogan.

Alright, folks, time to pay the piper and hit the road. Hope I don't explode.

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