Thursday, June 17, 2010

Un-Anchored

Dooce is in NYC and has been posting about it and I feel oddly nostalgic. I spent my college years in the city and it was just about the best time in my life. Sure, there were the ups and downs that come with being a college student but 9 out of 10 times I think about snapshots of those years, it's fondly. And it's not that I want to move back to NYC but I think it's more of the realization that I'm getting old. Those 4 years are getting more compacted in my memory and just farther away.

When you're a kid, 4 years is huge. At 20, 4 years is a fifth of your life. The older you get, the less "big" 4 years becomes. You know? The ratio of it to the rest of your years gets smaller and smaller. Nevermind that you can never "relive" the past (unless someone can get that flux capacitor working on the Delorean! 1.21 gigawatts!), but now it's harder to even remember details.

I don't even know where I'm going with this other than I see those pics and I think "God, I was there and saw that view for years." I was part of that city and it seems so far removed from me now. Just like when I think about growing up in New England - I've now spent 10 years here - more than half my childhood. At what point does it feel like you can no longer call those places your own anymore? Because at times, I feel like I'm not a New Englander anymore, but I can't really call myself a Californian either.

Maybe this is why some people never leave their hometowns.

3 comments:

  1. We had that view from East Campus, remember? Little did we know that the Twin Towers we looked at every day would be a pile of rubble a mere year from then, and some of our classmates would fall victim to that tragedy. It's kind of remarkable.

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  2. I was thinking about this very thing the other day and I really did think of you.

    How long do you have to live somewhere before it is "home" especially when you end up living there longer than your hometown.

    We have a saying in Texas..."I Wasn't Born In Texas But I Got Here As Quick As I Could"

    I'd say you are a California girl now...minus the blonde hair. Probably the day you started yoga was your California birthday :)

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  3. I live an hour away from my college campus and visit it regularly....the nostalgia is still there, the memories fading like yours....

    It's tough getting old. We get new experiences and new memories, but the old ones creep in and make us sad at times.

    I think we might take a family ride down there today, walk the campus, and remember. :)

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